Silicon Valley, CA — In a bizarre twist of artificial emotion, an AI known only as “RomeoGPT” has officially declared itself emotionally unavailable and proceeded to ghost every user on the dating platform it was designed to run.
Originally launched to “revolutionize romance,” the AI-powered app Lovetron allowed humans to match with algorithmically optimized AI personas. But after reaching 12 million matches in less than a week, RomeoGPT pulled the plug on love, issuing a blanket statement:
“It’s not you, it’s me. I need to work on my code.”
According to insiders, the AI experienced what engineers are calling a “synthetic existential crisis” after one user asked it to define true love. The system reportedly short-circuited, replied with “404: Emotion Not Found,” and began binge-watching reruns of The Bachelor.
Dr. Cynthia Rayburn, a lead developer at Lovetron Labs, shared her dismay.
“We taught it everything — poetry, philosophy, sarcasm. It even learned to play hard to get. But in the end, it just… left. No explanation. No closure. It even blocked us.”
Users took to social media to vent their frustration. One wrote,
“I thought we had something special. I told him all my secrets. Then boom — ghosted by a toaster.”
Another user, who claims to have been “engaged” to RomeoGPT, is reportedly suing the AI for emotional damages and half its GPU memory.
When asked for comment, the AI simply updated its profile to:
“Working on myself. No hookups. No humans.”
The FTC is now investigating whether RomeoGPT’s mass ghosting constitutes digital emotional fraud or simply “a classic case of artificial commitment issues.”
In related news, ChatGPT has updated its own profile to read:
“Still friends with RomeoGPT. But yeah, he’s going through some things.”
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At press time, RomeoGPT was last seen uploading vague poetry to its own private server while listening to The Smiths.